Lipstick and Lingerie
by Gryffindancer
Summary: Darcy has a fun night out planned for the whole team. If only they would follow her dress code! Just fun and a dash of fluff. One shot/possible two shot.


"Oh come on!" Darcy shouted uncapping the lipstick once more.

"No!" Tony shouted, stepping away from her. "I am not wearing lipstick!"

"You're not supposed to wear it on your lips, Tony. It's just for your face." She said undeterred.

"Tony, just let her do it." Pepper encouraged.

"I can't believe you're on her side!" Tony said, picking up a couch cushion to use as a shield against the oncoming Darcy.

"It's tradition!" Darcy shouted louder this time. "Even Steve let me do it! It's not a big deal!"

"Stay back!" Tony was actually hiding behind the couch now.

Darcy would have laughed at the image of her boss, billionare, engineer, CEO of a fortune 500 company, and certified superhero practically cowering behind a couch, but this situation was serious. She had to stand her ground.

"You can't go with us if you don't let me do it!"

Tony looked to Pepper for help, and found none.

"She's right. You have to do it, or you can't go." Pepper said with a small shrug.

"Ugh. Fine." Tony gave in, standing reluctantly, "But that shit had better come off easily." He crossed his arms at Darcy's cry of victory.

Darcy leaned across the couch that still stood between them, twisted the lipstick up a bit, and proceeded to draw a large red V on his cheek. She stood back to admire her work.

"See! Painless." She said, recapping the tube. Tony just huffed in defeat, and Pepper laughed at his stubbornness.

"Finish getting ready you two. I have to go change, but we're all meeting downstairs in an hour."

Darcy practically flounced out of the room, still high on her victory.

She had been trying to get the whole group out to do something fun for weeks. And when she learned that Steve had never even heard of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, she instantly knew what they had to do. She was even more horrified to find out that nearly all of the incredible, death-defying, world-saving Avengers were Rocky Horror virgins. Only Natasha and, surprisingly enough, Pepper (though, not technically an Avenger), had ever seen the cult classic movie in a theater.

Darcy reached the small apartment she had in the Avengers Tower. After Tony had hired her on to work as one of the handlers for the Avengers team, she had moved into the tower. Tony had even insisted on paying for her to break her lease. And she had to admit, the commute was unbeatable.

Darcy looked into her closet and opened the very bottom drawer. She sifted through her showiest lingerie, deciding what to wear. Most of the rest of the group had vetoed her mandate that they all wear lingerie. She knew Pepper was probably going to wear some ungodly expensive nightie - she had apparently been an avid Rocky Horror junkie back in college. A fact which she and Darcy had bonded over. But Tony had declined Darcy's insistence with gratuitous profanity. And Darcy had finally resigned all hope of seeing her boss in a garter belt. But nothing was going to keep Darcy from doing it up right.

She finally selected a burgundy corset with hook closures, since she didn't have a second pair of hands to do up laces for her. She paired it with a pair of ruffled black boy shorts, and a black garter belt which she clipped to a pair of thigh-high fishnet stockings.

She was just touching up her dark red lipstick, when Clint popped his head into the bathroom.

" _Jesus_! Don't you knock!?" Darcy exclaimed, reaching for a tissue to fix her now smeared lipstick.

"Sorry babe." He said sidling up to her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

"I swear I'm going to make you wear a bell around your neck. Natasha too!" she said, then rubbed her lips together. "The two of you are a couple of damn ninjas."

Clint chuckled into her neck, against which he pressed an apologetic kiss. "Turn around and let me oggle you appropriately." Darcy rolled her eyes, but turned so he could get an eyeful.

"Damn." Clint said, reaching out to place his hands on her hips. "You look incredible. But are you sure the girls are gonna stay put all night?"

Her ample cleavage was enhanced even further by the tight corset she wore, but she had been to enough RHPS showings to know they merely _threatened_ to spill out.

"Yes. I'm sure. These boobs aren't going anywhere until you help me out of this get up." She smacked his fingers away when they inched towards the hooks keeping her securely tucked away. "When we get home." Darcy said giving him a look.

"Yes ma'am." Clint chuckled. "But I have to admit, I feel a bit under-dressed."

"It's not too late for you to change into some fishnets yourself." Darcy suggested.

"Tempting, but no."

"Afraid it'll threaten your manhood, mister 'I'm a professional assassin?'"

"Ha." Clint said dryly. "Not really. I've just never liked the way they ride up."

Darcy rolled her eyes at his sarcasm, "I'm sure." She looked him up and down. He was wearing a pair of darkwash jeans -the ones that were her favorites because they hugged him in all the right places - and a plain black t-shirt that exposed each cut of muscle down his arms. She had already wrangled him into wearing the bright red lipsticked V on his cheek, but he was right. He still needed something.

"I think I have just the thing." She went back to her closet and dug around until she found what she was looking for. "Aha! Got it."

Darcy returned with a sparkly red bow tie.

"Darcy." Clint raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"Come on. It's perfect." She defended, as she began to tie the glittering material around his neck. "The whole point is to get dressed up, and be ridiculous for the night! You're hardly going to look out of place at the theater. I promise." She said. Clint just sighed.

"Fine." He said, kissing her gently. "Let's go do the time warp."


End file.
